What to do when Power Stops Serving Purpose — and Starts Serving Egos
I’ve learned the hard way that power does things to some people.
They lose themselves.
They grip onto control in ways that are unhealthy — and sometimes unsafe.
I’ve seen it in others.
And in my younger days, I caught myself edging toward it too.
It can look like:
Stepping in to “help” but really taking the reins from someone who needed to lead themselves.
Shutting people down because their insights don’t align with the narrative we’ve convinced ourselves is right.
Making the quick decision that silences voices because conflict feels too risky — and because managing the emotions and disharmony that follow is even harder.
Pulling strings behind the scenes, not for the purpose — but for control.
Sometimes it’s calculated — to feed the ego within.
But most of the time, it’s not.
It’s habit. Without a mirror or self-awareness.
It’s protection. It’s the quiet fear that “if I don’t, no one will.”
And sometimes, we’re surrounded by this style of leadership — it’s simply the way things are done around here.
Not that it’s actually ok.
In behavioural governance, these patterns aren’t just personality quirks — they’re cultural fault lines.
They shape decision-making, distort accountability, and erode the very alignment needed for outcomes to happen.
Clean power is different
It’s not about tightening your grip.
It’s about knowing when to hold steady and when to let go.
It’s power that serves the purpose, not the ego.
And understanding what it really means to lead with clean power — without controlling, rescuing, or silencing others.
What to do when you see it — or feel yourself slipping into it:
Name it — even privately. The act of calling it what it is (ego-based control, fear-based rescue, or silencing) starts to break the pattern.
Check your purpose. Ask: “Is this action serving the shared outcome, or is it serving my comfort, my image, or my control?”
Invite perspective. Even if it feels risky, open the door for others to share their insights — especially the ones that challenge you.
Re-align openly. If you’ve stepped into control unnecessarily, own it, hand the reins back, and recommit to shared authority.
That’s what we’ll unpack in my next workshop:
How to Lead with Authority and Integrity — Without Playing the Hero, the Martyr or the Manipulator
📅 Thursday 28 August 2025
🕓 4:00pm AEST | 💻 Live online
Because real leadership isn’t just about having power.
It’s about using it cleanly, wisely, and well.
